Summer Phooey!
Posted Fri, 05/17/13
The warm weather has settled in, so I'm not a happy camper. Rather than moan and groan all summer long, I've decided to explain the real reasons behind my hatred of the heat in one fell swoop, and leave it at that.
I realize most folks have been looking forward to summer with relish after a rather hard winter, but I'm not one of them. My instinctive aversion to dry, hot climates is mainly health-related. Being fair-skinned, I burn in the sun. Truthfully, I've never had a suntan in my life. I go straight to red. My eyes are also sensitive to overly bright light. Over the past several years I've even taken to draping a towel over the lamp shade on my computer desk, just to blunt the bothersome glare. I keep the lamp turned off as long as possible because it also exudes heat, which might explain my sensitivity to light. I don't see enough of it to grow accustomed to the brightness.
In the heat, my hands swell and turn blood red in color, as if I'm holding them in a 400-degree oven. Oddly, the redness doesn't travel beyond my hands. I've been to a doctor for the affliction many times, but haven't received an explanation for it. When I can no longer endure the searing heat in my hands, I'll plunge them into a cup of ice - which literally melts within a few short minutes. I can buy a soda topped with ice from the corner store, but if I hold the cup in my hands long enough, the ice melts quickly yet again. What am I - radioactive?
When I'm writing, I often soak a washcloth in cold water and place it over the tops of my hands as I type. As I also keep a fan blowing on me from across the room, my skin becomes as chapped as lips in a desert storm.
Worst of all, perhaps, is the ever-present infection that seems to lurk in my body. Heat exacerbates the issue, giving me flu-like symptoms which feel worse than the actual flu. It can sometimes keep me in bed for days at a time. Aside from dosing me with antibiotics, the infection specialist I've been to has yet to discover the root cause of the problem, or offered suggestions on how to put a stop to it altogether.
All of the above are my reasons why I hate summer heat. It's only May, but I'm already longing for the coolness of October.
I'm currently writing two books (Bloodlust and Glinhaven) and an article about Jewish food and culture, all of which I want to complete before the end of the year. I don't have time to be sick or miserable, so I'll be using lots of ice and cold washcloths to get through the summer.
Whatever it takes...
