Disingenuous Mixers

Posted Thu, 04/03/08

I've noticed the "dating scene" has changed drastically since I was last part of it, and I'm sorry to say not for the better.

I won't go into specific personalities, but the consistent behaviors I've encountered are the utter lack of sincerity, two-faced conversation, mind-game-playing and outright lying. I shouldn't be too surprised, but it's still a bit disappointing not to find at least one man amongst them who is honest from the start and remains that way.

Then there are the creeps who are gobshite's from the get-go. They are even without frilly social skills, which are a perpetuated myth anyway. These boyos are perhaps easier to deal with because all that's necessary is the initial "piss-off" scenario. If they have any sense, they usually don't come around again.

There are four things that raise a red flag for me:

  • If they find out about Foofer they either offer their sympathies for my loss or they brush off the knowledge as if to infer "he was just a dog, so what?" Needless to say, the latter does not hold my interest beyond that inference.

  • If they talk about themselves more than they listen to what is being said.

  • If they are suddenly unreachable when they were easily reachable before, or have a major "medical emergency" which explains their scarcity.

  • If they speak in sexual entendres from the start, which to me indicates a lack of respect and is not acceptable. Later maybe, if things go well, but not from the first conversations nor at the first actual meeting.

I've come to the inevitable conclusion I'm better off alone. I'm not ready or willing to put up with the aforementioned behaviors in any relationship again. In other words, when I'm a tetchy old crone I'll be all by myself in a rocking chair at the retirement home.

Not a bad way to go, really, as long as I have some good books to read right up to the end.